Silent Thoughts
by Tigereyes45
Summary: While they are beyond the wall the group full of suicidal fools take a rest inside a cave. (No way did that all happen in just one day.) While inside Gendry insists on being left alone, for fear he may recall things about a certain girl that would reveal the truth behind his leaving to her brother. Yet one can not always stops their thoughts.


_**My attempt at a short Gendry x Arya story. May do a longer one later, but for now consider this my test run.**_

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He did not know he would miss her this much. He never thought he could miss anyone this much, but here he was. Laying in the snow, about to risk his damned life at a chance of ending a war that has not even truly begun. A few feet away lies her older brother. Half brother. The bastard boy who somehow had gained the title of Lord of her home. How, he did not know. He could feel his chest tighten and tie itself up. It felt as if there was a serpent within him, wringing itself around his heart. Jealously was never an admirable quality nor one he dealt with very well.

"Hey you there, get closer to the group or you'll freeze to death." Warns Tormund. The last person he wanted to hear that from.

"He's right Gendry." Comes the voice of Jon Snow. One of the people who were in his thoughts. "There's no shame in it. We'll only be sleeping in a huddle to survive." he explains as if that was the concern of his. No sleeping near the other men was not a worry for Gendry. Sleeping near the Hound who had apparently kidnapped Arya, and next to Jon, Arya's favorite brother was the real problem. Even having Beric and the brotherhood close to him did not bother him as much as those two. Had the Hound hurt her? Did Jon know he had traveled with Arya? Did he know either of them had traveled with the girl?

"Gendry?" He pushes himself closer up along the wall, watching the fire glow near the others. They had found this cave while trying to find a shelter to rest within. It was just deep enough to allow Tormund and Jon to start a fire. The smoke would creep along the top of the cave and slowly slip out, thinning the smoke as it moved. Tormund felt convince the white walkers would not find the smoke trail. That the fire would keep them warm throughout the night.

Yet they all were in one corner of the cave. Split off into their smaller groups. Tormund had his feet on top of Jon's chest as he pokes at the Hound's face with his hands. Beric was lying next to Thoros the two rubbing shoulders but not touching any of the others. Jons was lying still, having taken to ignoring Tormund and his ridiculous position. That left Gendry on his own, choosing to stick to the opposite side of the fire by the cave wall.

"Do you insist on freezing during the night?" The Hound asks him.

"He never really took to sleeping next to anyone but that girl he use to travel with, I imagine." Thoros teases.

"What girl?" Tormund asks, sounding too eager to hear tell. It unsettles Gendry.

"No girl. I'll move closer if that'll shut you up." He says to Thoros. Silence once more spreads over the cave as Gendry gathers himself and moves closer to everyone else. He decides to lay a little bit away still, but was close enough to see the face of Jon Snow.

Gendry could see the resemblance easily enough. Both had dark brown hair, their grey eyes were easy to see in the day, and the way Jon's reflected the firelight even from a distance was the same way flames would dance in Arya's eyes. He was taller than the small girl had been last he'd seen her, but he was short for a man. Not nearly as tall as Gendry himself was. In that way they were similar again. Neither were close to Gendry's height.

"What's wrong?" Jon's voice breaks apart Gendry's thoughts.

"Nothing." He answers immediately. Gendry buries his head deeper into his arms, trying to hide his face before his thoughts would betray him more.

"Tell me of the tall woman." Tormund tells Jon, moving his legs to a more comfortable position.

"She apparently is with both of my sisters now. My little brother Bran has returned as well. All three are there, with Brienne of Tarth acting as my sisters' protector."

Jon continues to talk, telling Tormund something or other about this tall woman, but his sisters was what caught Gendry's ears. Jon said both of his sisters had returned. Arya was back in winterfell. She was alive?! Excitement bubbles up in Gendry, forming a new kind of determination. Originally he had gone on this adventure as a means to prove himself, to Jon, or perhaps just to himself. He wanted to show he could do more, be more, than just a smith. More than just the bastard of a damn noble. Even if that noble had been the king.

"I've missed her." Jon announces to the group. "Arya." He clarifies. "She was the only one who never made me feel as if I did not belong there. Robb was kind, but it wasn't the same."

"Aye, girls are known for stealing the hearts of men. They take a hold of one without ever letting go. Even if they do not know they have done so." Berric responds.

"You all sound like sad sacks. Go to sleep, we need to catch one of these damn things soon before I freeze what's left of my face off." The Hound orders as the men grew silent.

Yet Gendry felt he could not sleep now. No, not after learning Arya was alive. He would make it through this. Gendry would help Jon, he would catch one of the walkers so that Jon could convince the queens, and when its all over he would head to winterfell. He would find her, and if the gods be willing she will forgive him, and allow him to be her ally again. He wouldn't expect more. No he would not even allow himself to hope for more, especially after their poor parting. Arya was never one who easily forgave. Gendry doubts that would have changed.


End file.
